Dear England…A Guide to People from Northern Ireland

I know you’ve been drawn here by this post’s catchy title so let’s dive right in English folk and take this opportunity to learn a little more about people from Northern Ireland!

1. We know you don’t want us.

Yes Northern Ireland is the fart in the lift of the U.K.

You don’t want us but we’re here so cover your noses and get over it.

And yes, Northern Ireland was the equivalent of a leary sweaty drunk in a club putting its arm around a sober and very uncomfortable England following the recent General Election.

There were more negative comments on Twitter about Northern Ireland than I’ve had hot dinners (actually make that cold, slightly hardened dinners – I’m a parent).

2. We Can’t Talk Properly

Please know that we get the sweats when we have to ring O2/Next/Argos/Tesco.

We don’t understand you and you don’t understand us.

We pronounce our “ings” as “ins” (we’re “jokin”, you’re “joking”) and there are some key words in our vocabulary that you don’t even know the meaning of…! For example:-

– “Wee” – this means “small” not “piss” (back us up here Scotland)
– “Blether” – to ramble about nonsense
– “Footer” – to work at something (e.g. I’m having a wee footer at my website)

(If someone could let Apple know that we need these words added to their dictionary pronto that’d save me swearing so much at my phone. Please and thank you.)

3. We Don’t Like that You’ve Tried to Take Our “Craic”

Stop stealing the word “craic.”

We’ve been hearing it sporadically used in soaps etc lately.

Stop.

It does not sound right in an English accent and we invented it.*
*(this may not be true.)

4. We’re Not Alcoholics

No Ed Sheeran, we do not sit around drinking in bars and playing the fiddle all day.

Sorry to disappoint but we have jobs and responsibilities; there are even offices and businesses here.

5. We Prefer Facebook to Twitter

Facebook still seems to be the social media platform of choice in good old Northern Ireland. We love a good blether (see key words in Point 2) and 140 characters just doesn’t cut it.

6. We’re Super Friendly

We’re such a super friendly bunch since we stopped bombing each other here in Northern Ireland so why not come visit us?

There are some amazing places to visit here and we’d love to have you; you might even get to sit drinking in a bar all day playing the fiddle.

This Mum's Life
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26 Comments

  1. Roberta Seenan
    22nd July 2017 / 6:40 am

    I’m from Belfast but living in Australia over 40 years- tend not to use the Belfastisms as no one understands them here. When I go back though I love listening to everyone talk- especially at the shops – “do you want a wee bag ?” or “just put your wee card in there” my brother didn’t notice how much people said wee until I pointed it out to him! I lived in London in the 70’s and quite liked having an accent , it was a talking point even though were viewed with suspicion back then! Looking forward to visiting in Septenber!

    • 22nd July 2017 / 8:09 am

      Hi Roberta! This was great to read! Glad you still enjoy the unique N.I. dialogue after all that time in Australia!! Haha yes we definitely say ‘wee’ A LOT! Thank you so much for taking the time to leave a great comment! Enjoy your visit back over to over to good old N.I. in September!

  2. Jeanne Neuman
    22nd July 2017 / 11:13 am

    This was the first thing I saw when I logged onto FB this morning and I’m still laughing. I live in Colorado USA and my heritage is Scandinavian, but funny is funny no matter where you are or where you’re from. Looking forward to reading more of your posts!

  3. Chris
    22nd July 2017 / 11:19 am

    I think that this wee article sums us up very nicely!

  4. Christine
    22nd July 2017 / 3:27 pm

    I am from NI and have lived in London for 40 years and they still don’t understand me when I go into one. Recognise an Nl accent anywhere in the world and have great conversation and we all start to talk as we are in NI and laugh about it. Love it when I go home and listen to people and not forgetting yes we are friendly .

    • 22nd July 2017 / 3:38 pm

      Hi Christine! Great to hear from you! Yes the Northern Ireland accent is certainly unique – glad to hear you have retained a bit of yours! Thanks for taking the time to leave a comment!

  5. Rory
    22nd July 2017 / 3:58 pm

    Great wee article. Im from Norn Iron and live abroad. I notice loads of things when I go home. A great one is how reaffirm things (I’m going down to the shops, so I am OR I love going home, so I do). We also have the best phrases in the world, like “Wind yer neck in” and “Yer Ma’s yer Da” among many many more. Being abroad, we also feel the impulse to go up and speak to someone if we hear another norn iron accent, and its always a great conversation as a result. Finally, where other countries operate on 7 degrees of separation, I think Norn Iron has only 3. I have met so many people from the 6 counties where we know the same people, or a cousin, and we don’t rest until we establish that connected person!

    • 23rd July 2017 / 10:20 am

      Haha! Rory this is absolutely brilliant and everything you’ve said is so true!!! We’re obsessed by establishing a common connection when we meet a fellow Northern Irelander!! I actually laughed out loud at the reaffirming bit!!! Again, so very true!! I could write an entire book about our wee country! Thanks v.much for your fantastic comment!

  6. Rene crothers
    22nd July 2017 / 7:00 pm

    Oh my word but that sure was a good wee bit o craic love our wee country with all its wee sayings and all the wee headers here 😥😥

    • 23rd July 2017 / 10:15 am

      Thanks Rene glad you enjoyed it! We do love a bit of craic don’t we?! Thanks for taking the time to leave a comment!

  7. 31st July 2017 / 11:20 am

    Now i can understand my Northern Irish workmates a little better 🙂 Thank you

  8. 31st July 2017 / 1:04 pm

    Love this😀sending it to my friend in Essex who is from Antrim originally – through Facebook of course!! #bigpinklink

  9. 1st August 2017 / 8:15 pm

    Fantastic!! You’ve sold it, I would definitley like to visit. Hey we are from Norfolk so we are used to no-one understanding our accent and words that no-one else has heard of outside of Norwich, although slightly disappointed you dont sit in bars all day playing the fiddle. xx #bigpinklink

  10. 2nd August 2017 / 11:28 am

    Oh noooo…. I say ‘craic’ all the time *hangs head in shame* I’ll have to stop…! I didn’t know about the ‘wee’ thing-I thought that was entirely limited to the Scottish!! I do feel for the Irish-there’s a lot of stereotypes! I was horrified when watching Call The Midwife, that during that period, English landlords wouldn’t let to the Irish…! Thanks for the laugh, and for setting the record straight!!
    #bigpinklink

    • 2nd August 2017 / 11:20 pm

      Those landlords were probably just right in fairness! We do like a good party! Thanks for your comment x

  11. 6th August 2017 / 10:51 pm

    I want Northern Ireland – it’s the accents! Though, yes, I do not particularly want the DUP! Mind you, I don’t want the Tories either! #BigPinkLink

    • 6th August 2017 / 11:25 pm

      Ahaha you’ve no idea how ridiculous we sound really and our accent is positively horrific on TV. But thank you!!xx

  12. Freda Lindsay
    7th August 2017 / 2:08 pm

    I love this. It is so true. I,m in the United States now , But was born and raised in Belfast. It will always be my home.
    My favourite sayings are . Up to yer oxters , When you finish a phone call it’s Bye Bye Bye , Until someone hangs up .
    Northern Ireland people are unique. We are the friendliest and most helpful people you could meet.

    • 7th August 2017 / 8:55 pm

      Haha brilliant Freda! So glad you remember some good old NI expressions and ways!! And I agree wholeheartedly with you that we’re the most friendly people around! It’s lovely that you still consider NI home!
      Thank you so much for taking the time to comment!

      • Freda Lindsay
        7th August 2017 / 9:11 pm

        It will always be my home. I lived there until 14 years ago. I love ❤️ going home . Best bread and Ulster Fry anywhere. My Daughters , Grandchildren and my Mum are still there . So I have great reasons to go home

        • 7th August 2017 / 9:13 pm

          Wow yes you do indeed have great reasons to go home Freda! Lovely! They must all really look forward to seeing you! Totally agree with you on the bread and Ulster fry – can’t beat it!!

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