Sometimes I feel that more relationships would survive nowadays if people expected less from love.
Hasn’t “love” got a terrible name for itself these days? It’s expected to be this all-singing, all-dancing, totally encompassing explosion of emotion every.single.day.
There are constant reminders of how much other couples “love” each other plastered relentlessly across social media (any regular readers of my blog will know how much I despise social media at times!)
But how we measure love has gone very wrong.
If your partner hasn’t just whisked you off to Paris as a surprise birthday treat he mustn’t love you.
If your partner doesn’t come home from work and immediately take over childcare or household chores then he mustn’t love you.
If your partner doesn’t constantly tell you he loves you then he mustn’t love you.
Wrong. Wrong. WRONG.
Real Love Makes Mistakes
I want to celebrate what I believe to be real love in this post. You see, in my opinion, real love makes mistakes; it can be unkind, jealous and downright nasty, but it is always sorry.
Real love is actually rather boring and a bit mundane, but it is steadfast, reliable and strong.
Real love is not being happy all the time or making memories every single bloody day. Real love is overcoming the unhappy times and coming out the other side.
10 5 Things I Hate Love About You
So, in honour of real love, and the fact my husband and I have just celebrated our 8th wedding anniversary (or as I like to call it “toleration anniversary”), I wanted to share with you 5 reasons why I happen to love my husband:-
1. When I ring him, he answers his phone.
Obviously there are times he physically can’t, but if he can, he will.
And that’s even though he knows I’m probably just going to ask him to bring home something from the shops (wine usually, or baby wipes).
2. He Takes My Side
If someone has annoyed or upset me he’ll have my back.
He won’t necessarily always agree with me, but he doesn’t like it when people hurt me. He sticks up for me, always.
3. We Get Through the Bad Days
We have bad days.
We have days when we bicker and argue and name-call. Some would say that’s not real love. I disagree.
Everyone has “off” days. Everyone has days when work’s been a nightmare or they’ve not had much sleep or something’s playing on their mind. And who better to take it all out on than the one person you know is still going to love you when all’s been said and done?
Yes I know we shouldn’t try to hurt people we love but sometimes, often due to a culmination of external factors, tempers get frayed and insults get exchanged.
But we work through it and come out of it having found and added another little piece to our jigsaw.
4. He Works Hard
No I’m not going to tell you he irons, mops, hoovers, and dusts, then morphs into “Daddy Daycare” within minutes of arriving home.
My poor husband wouldn’t know which end of the mop is up and has changed approximately one poopy nappy in his lifetime (we have 3 kids).
But he has a day job and runs his own business and works super hard at both to provide for us.
If I ask, he helps and that’s enough for me.
5. Car Insurance
Every year for my birthday, while other girls are getting roses and perfume, I get car insurance. My hubby spends ages hunting around for the best deal then pays for it for me.
And no, I’m not a helpless 1940’s housewife; I make (a little bit of) my own money and can find my way around a price comparison site with the best of ‘em.
But it’s the little practical things like this my husband does that show me he cares and I love him for that.
Boring. But I Love It!
So how utterly boring was that list?
No mention of diamonds, trips to Paris, extravagant gifts, toned abs or perfection.
Just a solid, honest, reliable man (with a much fatter belly than he had the day I married him), who I happen to love with all my heart.